User:Motorhed/UDstuff/McZeds

This page has been copied from the UD Wiki, however I have stripped out the contributions of others (save for images) so as to provide the original article without taking other people's work.

Welcome to the Official McZed's&trade; Fast Food Restaurant Wiki page!

Restaurant Locator.
Atari Techno   CO-FOUNDER/DISTRICT MANAGER


 * 1) Darvall Heights - The Henslow Arms. (29,25)    Status: NOW OPEN.    Manager: Glass Onion.    Staff:        David Treanor.
 * 2) Ridleybank - On Hold.   Status: Notifying next of kin.    Manager: Missing.    Staff: Presumed tasty.

'''McZed's&trade; is growing! Join our team today!'''

We hope to have a franchise in every suburb in Malton! Let us know if you're interested!

McZed's&trade; Menu.
Have them your way!&trade;

Company Info.
Founded in late 2005, McZed's&trade; is Malton's oldest and best fast food chain. Dedicated to quality food and service, McZed's&trade; hopes to be your family's favorite restautant. We use only the best prime cuts of meat from the most lively and hardy undead fiends. Now the Aunt Gladys you thought was forever lost can be a part of you for eternity!

Show your support for the McZed's&trade; chain by placing this tag on your user or group page!

Testimonials.
Don't just take our word for it, see what these folks had to say!


 * "I was a strict Vegetarian until I sprinted into the local McZed's&trade; to escape an undead horde. I always had a problem with eating defenseless creatures - but since these delicious items are made of human beings, there's no problem!" -- Terrance Buckwhite, Copy Editor


 * "When I've just fended off a horde of brain-sucking ghouls, the last thing I want to do is cook! That's when I take the whole (remaining) family out to McZed's&trade; for a good meal that's easy on the pocketbook!" - Molinda Battysnipe, Home-Maker


 * "Before McZed's&trade;, bodies were littering the streets and causing all sorts of health issues.. not to mention the fact that they kept standing up.. Now that Mickey Z's is here, you can finally walk the streets relatively unhindered. I stroll down to our local restaurant all the time!" - Rupert Himbinkendap, Law Clerk


 * "Something as distasteful as the Undead should never be considered fit for human consumption. - That's what I thought before I tried the new Rotter&trade; sandwich! Them's good eatin'!" - Allen Gropensmith, PHD


 * "Graaagh! GRRAAAAGGHH! BARHAH -- grrraAARRKKKkkk.." - The late Mr. Smummins, Future Value Meal

Kid's Kompound
'''Hey, kids! Here's a chance to play with your food without being punished!'''

http://www.doompuppet.com/cdf/umalt.gif

Hey, little Survivors! Help tasty Uncle Malty navigate the streets of Malton without being accosted by Harmanz or the CDF! Watch out for Barricades as well as you guide him to the closest McZed's&trade; Restaurant kitchen! Be careful! Hit more than one obstacle and you won't make it to McZed's&trade; before closing time!!

http://www.doompuppet.com/cdf/zedmaze.gif

(Crayons are available for younger customers, ask your server!)

Uncle Malty &trade; & &copy; McZed's&trade; Inc.

Check out this hot game available at all quality retailers!



Be sure to ask your parents to buy McZed's Land&trade; for the Pretendo Entertainment System! Help Myron Hero&trade; find the Foodlooter&trade; before he sells the special McZed's&trade; recipes to the competition! You'll have to hack your way through 63 levels of intense action, converting undead ghouls into tasty treats along the way! You have to get McZed's Land&trade; for the Pretendo Entertainment System!

Employee Info.
A McZed's&trade; employee should always be cheerful and helpful while serving customers. Attention to detail is key! Did you smile? Did you greet the customer the moment they entered the restaurant? Did you tell them about the nutritional benefits of human flesh?

We here at McZed's&trade; applaud a good work ethic and a positive attitude. Our employees are expected to keep their uniforms sharp and their demeanor pleasant. Serve others as you would wish to be served!

Some key points to remember are as follows:


 * 1) Attend to your uniform as if it is the only outfit you will ever own. Treat it with care!
 * 2) Treat every customer with the utmost respect and attention.
 * 3) If a customer has a question about McZed's&trade; products, refer them to our handy pamphlet entitled "It's not so wrong!"
 * 4) Do not, under any circumstances, allow the undead to leave the preperation area.
 * 5) If a customer has a complaint, apologize for the inconvenience and refer them to a Manager immediately.
 * 6) Do not let any non-employees behind the counter for any reason.
 * 7) When handling the zombified human meat, remember to wear a hair-net.

Prospective Managers
So you've visited the McZed's&trade; page. You've eaten McZed's&trade; food. Now you want to open your very own location!

Here are the steps you should follow as a prospective member of the McZed's&trade; franchise:


 * 1) Select a Suburb. This should be fairly easy. Pick one you're familiar with.
 * 2) Select a Location. Preferrably a building with good traffic, but no large amount of squatters that will make renovations difficult.
 * 3) Hire your staff. Existing groups can staff any given location, but in some cases you may need to start handing out applications.
 * 4) Harvest some undead meat. 'Nuff said.
 * 5) Add your location to the guide above. If you're lost on how to do this, simply ask for help on the Talk page and a representitive can help out.
 * 6) Advertise, Advertise, Advertise! Tag your suburb with the location of your McZed's&trade; whenever you can. Make sure to edit the Wiki page for your location to proudly display your changes.*
 * 7) Profit.

Class Action Lawsuit
Our attorneys have informed us that we are legally required to inform all customers of a pending class action lawsuit. If you dined at our Darvall Heights location between Sept. 21st, 2005 and Sept. 24th, 2005, you may have inadvertantly ingested a narcoleptic. We apologize for this inconvenience and assure you that McZed's&trade; takes quality control very seriously.

UD Profile Information
If you are a member of the McZed's&trade; family, you are not required to put "McZeds" in your group affiliation for your UD Profile. If you DO want to do this, however, Please put McZeds with no apostrophe and no &trade; symbol, as it will create a link directly to this page if McZed's&trade; happens to get onto the UD stats list.